As one of the most traditional elements of a wedding Reception, your first dance is the very first thing you and your new spouse get to do together. Your first memory as Mr. & Mrs. is a dance - how sweet is that?!
But, if you are not one for attention, or not a huge dancing fan, a first dance can be a very intimidating and a worrying moment for some couples. Some brides and grooms view the first dance as an added level of pressure to not only be present in front of so many people, but to perform in front of them too.
We know this is a real fear for some, so we have a few ideas to make your first dance a little less stressful for you and your spouse.
Be Confident in Your Song Pick!
It’s not uncommon for the couple to already have a song in mind that they consider to be “their song”, and is usually the one they do their first dance to. Some songs are special to a couple from a special incident that happened while they were dating or when they first met. Who wouldn’t want to incorporate that sentiment into your wedding?
It’s almost a magical moment when you find the song that has a deep meaning for both of you. Every time you hear it you can’t help but smile. Be sure to listen to your song a lot, as much as possible that way you know every word and note for when it’s time to do your dance.
The best song length is between 3-4 minutes. This gives everyone time to take pictures and watch you two do your thing. Choose something that you both love and are comfortable dancing to. Don’t be afraid to pick something upbeat and lively.
2. Record Over Your Song
Before the wedding, work with your DJ to record a message for your guests. During your first dance, your DJ will play your message to your guests overtop of your first dance song.
We think this is a fun and personal way to show how thankful you are for your partner and all of your guests. This takes preplanning, but is an excellent way to take a bit of the focus off of you and your partner, and direct it back towards your guests during this time.
3. Take Dance Lessons With Your Future Spouse
If you’re wanting to do a little more than just wing a two-step with your partner, consider taking professional dance lessons with each other. This can be such a fun bonding activity for you and your fiancé during your engagement that doubles as a helpful skill for your wedding day.
Taking lessons will also help any jitters you may have about dancing in front of everyone. Staying consistent in your practice will help not only help you learn the steps flawlessly, but also boost your confidence for when the time finally comes. The most important thing is to have fun and enjoy the moment making new memories.
Pro Tip: You don’t want to end the happiest day of your life caring for blisters on each other. Make sure that you get appropriate footwear for your dance, even if you have to swap shoes out during this time. You’ll want to practice in the shoes you’ll be wearing, this will both break them in if they’re new and will help you get comfortable with the dance moves in them.
4. Make it Fun!
Incorporate fun dance moves in with your dance. It’s okay to be silly, especially with your new partner in crime. Don’t be afraid to dance to something upbeat, or do a mix of slow and fast songs combined. The faster pace songs will allow you to get some nerves out and there will be less of an expectation to get every step perfect.
5. Keep it Private
Your wedding day is about you and your future spouse. At the end of the day, if a first dance is going to cause either of you stress, you have the option to avoid that! It is your day after all.
But if you like the idea of dancing with your new husband, opt for a private first dance instead. After the ceremony and photos, let your bridal party join the cocktail hour while you and your partner enjoy a first dance together in a different part of the venue, just the two of you. At the Amazing Graze Barn, we have several beautiful spots for you to do this! While you do not want to keep your guests waiting too long, an extra 3 minutes for a private dance with your husband is worth it! Or if you are already worried about the length of your cocktail hour, dance with your partner after the wedding, when you arrive in the private space of our Farm Stay for the night.
Keeping your first dance private allows you and your husband to still experience the tradition and sweet act, but eliminating the fear of being in front of others.
No matter how you and your Mr. choose to experience your first dance, focus on each other, what the dance symbolizes, and take it one step at a time.